Wednesday 16 June 2010
Dedicated to the Ones I Love
Some relationships are so fleeting, it seems, and others are so enduring. Some are relatively simple while others are so complicated. The complicated ones are exhausting and doomed to failure while the simple ones just float on and on until one day the inevitable occurs. Sigh. I think about dying almost every night as I am falling asleep...don't worry, it is not an obsessive or morbid ritual. It is just that I want to be 'right' with it or maybe just 'ready ' for it. For me that means really living a life that that fits me well. I am trying to follow a longing that keeps resurfacing on a regular basis and that is to be more and more self-sufficient and simple. Funny, huh, that what I want is so 19th century when you think about it. Yes, I know, what I have now is pretty ideal in many ways, but, this other longing is always back there in the fog. I think it is a longing for freedom just to do, and to be, while I can, on my own little piece of earth. Another of what I like to call 'a true thing'. Not to try to get that true thing would be regret on my part. Regret, seems not to be an option. I miss my 'girl' and I miss a few others that have made this such a good run so far. It's the whole package, really, that is painting this life. There is so much more to do...ride 'em cowgirl.