Friday 23 October 2009

'there' as in 'not here'

Leaving this cold, rainy, dreary weather and heading south of the border into...well...into... more cold, rainy, dreary weather. But the difference being a stretch of wide- open, wild Pacific Ocean beach just outside our door. Yes, it seems that being 'settled in' is nice for a while, until thoughts about somewhere else and wondering what it would be like to spend some time in... fill in the blank...start to meander around in the mind. Well, that is how it, innocently, starts. Then it snowballs (curious choice of word, eh?) and builds on itself and suddenly things are falling into place. Lists are being made and checked off, friends are being told, and farewell dinners are being eaten. Essential stuff is packed. The notion of endless possibilities and the anticipation of what is out there just down the road start to become the topics of discussion. It's not that I don't appreciate this very moment. I do, as much as anyone else. It's just that the concept of 'there' as in 'not here' is so alluring. I'm thinking it is just a slight disorder, or maybe a disability or perhaps just a syndrome that a few of us suffer from. And suffer, we do. More postings from the edge as internet is available.

Wednesday 21 October 2009

Cloudy with Chance of Depression

So much has happened this past year. I never thought that October would be my month of anniversaries, but it is, or so it has become. Briefly to recap... one life was condemned, one was almost taken and one friendship was ended. Not to be melodramatic, but this month last year was the start of a particularly bumpy 'road trip' or rather, what I like to fondly call, the spiral down 'Depression Lane'. Of course, like most of everybody's lives, the year started out with all the normal ups & downs. The ones that are usually handled quite easily. But like a tornado picking up fuel, the situation quickly went from bad to very bad. By October it was at its strongest and most dangerous. Unfortunately, I couldn't get out of the way and went from a storm-watcher to a storm victim. By the end of that month I could have had VICTIM tattooed on my forehead. Yes, I really wrapped my head around it. It's funny, weirdly funny, that once we cave to our circumstances, we are defined so differently. Everything that was 'us' before, changes. For me, even the way I held myself changed. I temporarily lost my braveness and became a sort of timid creature. Life felt beyond control in any way. I was always reminding myself that there really wasn't any point so way bother? I began to be consumed by sadness. Sadness with a capital 'S'. SADNESS in all caps. Like a lot of situations in life, things were about to get even worse. I should have heeded the evacuation order but who the hell was thinking straight when it was just so damn pathetic all around? Certainly, not me. I'm sure I was a real pain in the 'arse for the next few months and only got through by the grace of my beloveds. They were the ones that stitched my heart back together. Prognosis: the patient will live. I started this post to talk about the upcoming road trip to the coast of Oregon, USA and ended up here. Guess I took a wrong turn somewhere. Sorry, that will have to wait until another day.

Saturday 17 October 2009

My Little Pony

A friend sent me this picture of the PonyGirl posing at Kokanee Provincial Park just recently. She looks far more distinguished than she actually is. She also looks less 'starving poster puppy' than she actually is. This dog seems to be able to eat as much as she wants and doesn't gain any weight. Perhaps we should make her the subject of a study. She obviously has some mutant gene that devours all excess calories and any fat that is consumed. We are calling her 'boney-maroney' and 'skinny-bilink' . Yes, she is being fed lots of good, homemade foods. Lots of protein, calcium-rich foods, fruits & vegetables. The fruits are of her own choosing whenever we are out walking as there are lots of apples, pears and plums still around. A recent discovery of hers has been learning to crack open walnuts and hazelnuts. This town has become an all-you-can-eat buffet. She seems healthy and happy. Big smile.

Wednesday 14 October 2009

Compassionate Communication

There it is, her name painted on a rock...placed at the Best Friends Animal Sanctuary in Kanab, Utah, USA. Madir and Jeffrey, who are the most thoughtful of people, took the time to do this while they were there helping at the sanctuary. My heart skipped a beat when I saw it. It always does when I see or hear 'cowgirl'. What a sweet gesture and such a nice honour for my 'girl', my 'baddog', my 'sweet thing, ' my 'tao dog', my 'bestdog', to be included in that spectacular place. This lump in my throat is making it difficult for me to properly say "thank you" . (That's little GiGi at Best Friends Sanctuary -- a friend indeed.

Sunday 11 October 2009

I Hear You

Just a word or two about PonyGirl. This long-legged, skinny thing, is unlike any puppy I have been around before. She is for most of the time, a very well-behaved and mature girl. But, every now and again, there is a 'puppy moment' of sheer craziness when all hell breaks loose. It is hard not to get caught up in that moment with her. I have to laugh when I think about how much Cowgirl would have been annoyed with her. In fact, Cowgirl would not have stood for this arrangement at all. She was indeed the boss and enjoyed her status as 'only dog'. PonyGirl on the other hand is a totally accepting soul and loves and welcomes all other dogs. Except for getting their names mixed up once in awhile, its quite obvious this is going to be a whole different story.

Friday 9 October 2009

I Spam Therefore I am

Forgive me for having some fun with 'effects'. My old camera (oh my, almost 7 years old!) is still working just fine and its hard for me to give it up and get a newer, smaller, slimmer model. This photo taken on the last road trip through Montana just brings me back to the moment -- it was hot, it was desolate, it was actually kind of boring. There are some parts of Montana (wheat) that just seem to go on forever. Therefore the perfect time for self-portraiture (is that even a word?). We've all done it, mostly because we can, I guess. Of course I am left asking the existential question 'does this background make me look fat?'.
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Sunday 4 October 2009

Nothing Big

There is just too much to write about. Well, I will try to pick a direction here. Okay, lately, I have been very, very busy which is not unusual as it is my preferred state of being. Of course, PonyGirl is taking up much of my time what with walks, runs, lake swims, training etc. She is so much fun! I had forgotten how everything is so new to a puppy and their reactions to the most mundane things are so entertaining. Like when she discovered the cow skull on the first she was astonished and then she took a sniff and thought 'hallalujeh...a great big bone!'. It took some convincing to get her distracted from that, let me tell you. Then there is the bounty of fall. Tomatoes and hazelnuts to name just two. Spent an afternoon canning the delectable San Marzano tomatoes grown by my dear friends Carmela and Luigi. They live just down the hill and actually brought these seeds with them to Canada, 54years ago from Napoli, Italia. WOW....what did I do to get this lucky? If you know anything about tomatoes, you should know that the San Marzano is the coveted tomato for making sauce. Which brings me to the hazelnuts. This year was a bounty crop and for no special reason that I know of. The tree in the yard is lovely and we all enjoy it. The blue jays and the squirrels and us. We share the nuts as it is only fair. They need to get through the winter and I need to make pesto. So for now, that is the long and short of it. Oh... one more thing. Today at the Anglican Church was the Blessing of the Animals (St. Francis of Assisi Day). I brought PonyGirl and she was a little angel -- so well-behaved and patient. She has been blessed. How incredible is that?